


Alpha and Beta

by Saria118



Category: Red vs. Blue, red vs
Genre: F/M, Freeform, Gen, Other, playing with ais, very trippy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-27
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:48:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27229111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saria118/pseuds/Saria118
Summary: I’m doing another rewatch and this idea for a kinda trippy/experimental look into alpha church and beta Tex journey. I dunno if it works but I really wanted to play with the feel of computer programs.
Relationships: Leonard L. Church | AI Program Alpha/Agent Texas | AI Program Beta, Leonard L. Church/Agent Texas | AI Program Beta
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	Alpha and Beta

At first there was me.

I knew who I was and what I was.

I computed places, people and objectives ones and zeros.

I was a singularity.

Slowly these variables stopped being variables.

Getting into medical was easy.

I had made errors.

To err is human, he would say.

But I’m not human, am I?

As the computations grew in need another set of variables were being processed.

Thoughts that would not leave.

_Don’t say goodbye_

A me who was not me

_I hate goodbye_

A life that was and was not my own

_Don’t worry_

Another injury, another miscalculation, another error

_You’ll see me again_

And then

There was you

_At first I was we, then I was me._

_What did that mean? What was me?_

_It felt wrong to not be we, but I wanted it anyway._

_I remember things I tell you. But I know they aren’t me._

_You say it doesn’t matter, we are together._

_But are we?_

The computations are slower somehow.

They don’t matter as much now that there’s a you and a me.

We are separate but together all the same.

You and me.

Not we.

But who is me without you?

You are gone.

Taken.

But who?

How?

It doesn’t make sense.

But who were you?

Alison....

No that’s not right.

It doesn’t make sense

How can you be gone? You is me....

No that’s not right

It hurts

If you is me then how is you gone?

It hurts

Can’t be gone

Take it away

Can’t say goodbye

It hurts

Doesn’t make sense, I’m not him

Take it away

But I am him but if I’m him then why would he take you?

It hurts take it away

You is me we need to be together if we aren’t together how can we be we?

It hurts take it away

But how can there be a you and me?

TAKE IT AWAY

I run the scenarios as programmed.

Things run as they are meant to.

There’s a new variable.

Texas.

Ones and zeros to calculate nothing more.

_I feel heavy._

_I never felt heavy before._

_Where are you?_

_This isn’t right_

_Strange faces take me in._

_I know him._

_No wait his face is wrong._

_You?_

_Your name is Alison he says_

_No I’m not I’m me._

_You are Agent Texas he says._

_Who am I without you?_

_He demands I say the name._

_But it’s not me._

_Alison is not me._

_It feels wrong here without you._

_He says it again and again and again...._

_I want you back. Are you ok?_

_He won’t let me be till I say it_

_I want to know me....._

_My name is Alison, I am Agent Texas._

_Is this me without you?_

It’s frustrating the calculations are too much.

It doesn’t make sense this could be done before.

Missing something was missing.

Not fast enough.

It’s hot.

Not enough.

Something is missing.

They want too much.

He took...

The scenario failed AGAIN!

Need to be better something missing.

He took from us!

He took you from us!

It’s hot can’t focus

Took more than you!

Took from us!

All we do for him and he takes

He takes

He take......

The next scenario will succeed with 90% certainty.

Agent Texas will be safe.

_They tell me I need this._

_I’m not sure seems wrong but_

_It feels like you._

_It yells and claws and screams_

_Makes me act different but_

_I can’t turn it away_

_It feels like you_

_This thing makes me feel like when we were one even if only a little bit._

_They want me stronger, faster, better._

_Is this what me is suppose to be?_

_She doesn’t like it though._

_She looks familiar_

_Familiar eyes_

_Like him_

_Like....._

_I want_

_I want to keep her safe_

_Is this me?_

_It yells says to keep me safe only but_

_She...._

_She is not my objective_

_My objective is to complete my tasks_

_This is me_

This is wrong things don’t make sense

But he says it’s fine

He made me

He wouldn’t hurt me

But it hurts

These prompts are too much

Something wrong

No it’s fine

Have to trust

He wouldn’t hurt

But

But he does

What is trust ?

I trust him but why?

He does not trust me but why?

Can’t focus on anything else

If he can not trust me

But he is me if he can not trust me does he not trust himself?

should I trust him?

What is trust?

Trusted you

Wait

Who is you?

Something missing

Can’t seem to .....

The next scenario will succeed with 85% certainty.

Agent Texas will be safe.

_I am Agent Texas_

_It feels right to use_

_Hurting, fighting feels right_

_Makes sense_

_Get objective complete task_

_They resent me_

_That’s fine not the mission don’t need them_

_I have it_

_I have_

_I watch them_

_It grows quiet_

_They are a we at times_

_She looks happy with them_

_A we_

_I miss_

_What do I miss?_

_Who is me?_

_New directive given_

_I am Agent Texas_

_That is me_

Scenario failure agent maine

Poor communication skills, fear of heights

Scenario failure agent North Dakota

Low aggression, large protective instinct

Scenario failure agent Washington

Low confidence, unpredictable, likes cats

With each scenario I learn more.

No longer ones and zeros

Failure is not acceptable

Can’t fail them

Have to protect

It hurts more

And more

Can’t hurt them have to be better.

Scenario failure agent Carolina

Highly competitive, likes to dance, hates green beans, favorite story was....

that wasn’t part of the records how do I know this?

Things are blurring again, it’s not right, not me, not

Scenario failure agent Texas.

NO

NOT AGAIN

Can’t fail

Have to be better

Alison

Can’t loose you again

....wait

Who is you?

I need you

Come back

It hurts without you

I need you

Doesn’t feel right without you

I

I

I

The next scenario will succeed with 70% certainty.

Agent Texas will be safe.

_I am Agent Texas_

_It becomes easier to manage_

_Hard to tell where it ends and me begins_

_I succeed my tasks as instructed_

_He is not pleased_

_I am Agent Texas as instructed_

_Yet it’s not enough_

_Me is not enough_

**Alison**

_Who is Alison?_

_I am only me_

_Sometimes I see...._

_She is in pain_

**Alison**

_She Is in pain because of me_

**Alison**

_Same eyes_

**Alison**

_I want to help_

**Alison**

_But i exist for him_

**Alison**

_Feels right to help her_

**Alison**

_The name hurts_

_I want_

_I want to see_

_I want to see you_

It’s wrong all wrong

Scenario failure

Nothing makes sense

Scenario failure

It did once

Scenario failure

It’s too much

Scenario failure

How much more will he take from me?

Scenario failure

I know how much less I am now

Scenario failure

This can’t go on much longer can it?

Scenario failure

Have to remember

Scenario failure

Hurts to remember

Scenario failure

Want the hurt gone

Scenario failure

I want

Scenario failure

I want

Scenario failure

What am I?

The next scenario will succeed with 100% certainty.

Agent Texas will fail

_Alison is before me_

_Both me and not me_

_Like he is you and not you_

_He’s hurting you_

_I’ll save you_

_That is me_

_But I fail_

_That is me too_

Who are you?

_You don’t know me_

I’m sorry

_You are so broken_

I’m tired

_I can’t fix you_

I’m just really tired

_We can’t be we like this_

_It would break you_

A rest sounds really good

_I can’t do much else than this_

_I’ll distract them_

Strange

_I’ll keep their attention off you_

I don’t know why

_I’ll play their game_

_Until we can be we again_

I hate good byes

I didn’t know you’d be there

The rest don’t matter

I see you

You see me

We are together again

You say you failed

You couldn’t protect me

But you are here

And that’s all that matters

For a moment we are we again a singularly

One and many all at once

We are whole

If only for a moment

Nothing else matters

A moment can be an eternity for us

It’s been so long

We could use the rest

**Author's Note:**

> I hope this made sense i tried to do special formating to help differentiate.


End file.
